search

for

something

Swipe left to keep

Kept articles are stored in your profile for you to read later.

Got it!

College things that aren't OK in actual adulthood

none

0
0
88

University of Virginia

culture

College things that aren't OK in actual adulthood

All good things must come to an end

Katie Mansoor

12.11.17

For a bunch of supposed "adults", college-aged students sure do act like a bunch of tweens sometimes. It's one of the reasons that college years are some of the best of your life! That being said, here are some college habits that are fine for now but should probably be eradicated before joining the work force.


Four lokos


There is nothing quite as vomit-inducing yet comfortingly nostalgic as the taste of a four-loko. There’s something so timeless about four loko’s ability to endure even after all of the new ingredient restrictions and lawsuits. If you love something, though, let it go. By the time graduation rolls around, I think we're all supposed to be really into craft beer or single-barrel whiskey or something--just not four loko.

Juuling in public spaces (and, while we're at it, pretty much any juuling at all)




Dear UVA library juulers, you are not the least bit inconspicuous. A big vape cloud drifting up out of a back-corner cubicle in Clem can pretty much be one thing and one thing only. It’s fine for now, but let's kick that juuling habit before graduation.

Going days without ingesting a single vitamin or nutrient



Our young bodies are young and resilient, meaning that a four-day diet of nothing but easy mac, Burnetts, and hot pockets is OK for now. However, eventually we’ll probably have to start eating actual human being food. Try to start incorporating a leafy green or two into meals to avoid disease.

6-Hour naps


I will admit that I am possibly the biggest offender of this rule. On several occasions, I have fallen asleep in the middle of the day only to awaken to a dark and completely silent apartment, left only to guess how many moons have passed since I fell asleep. It’s a terrible feeling, really, and I’m pretty sure most employers do not schedule six-hour blocks for napping.

Consuming enough caffeine to paralyze a gorilla


I get it, running on two and a half hours of sleep is exhausting and nearly impossible. Sometimes, the only way to keep going is to drink coffee until your hands develop a tremor and your eyes are literally vibrating inside their skull. Again, fine for now, but I think real adults have some kind of regular sleeping regiment. What do I know, though?